BREAKING PROTOCOL
-Our Journey of Sunflowers and Rainbows-
Volume 1
By: Angie Jennings
Originally Written February 8, 2022
As I finished checking out I just had to get a picture of Abigail finger-tracing the stars on the wall of her pediatrician’s office. In those few seconds my mind traveled back to standing in close to the same spot about 3 years ago. At that time my daughter Rachel was doing the checking out and I was holding Abbie. We had been going over basic shapes for some time and I was showing her one and saying “star.” To my surprise she said it right back..”star”…and Rachel came right over to drink in the moment! Rachel and Fabio had always been good at making the most of even the seemingly small moments. Today I could almost close my eyes and feel Rachel there and I was so thankful for that memory. I was sure to tell Abigail the story of seeing the stars and how she said “star” for the first time when she was just a baby.
I suppose this is just as good a place as any to begin. I mean why was I, the GiGi (my special grandmother name) taking this 3 year old to the doctor without her parents anyway? Our granddaughter Abigail had suddenly began with “symptoms” that had kept her up during the night. During a pandemic, you don’t take certain symptoms lightly
The previous week I had gone alone to the pediatrician’s office for those “special forms” for Abbie’s pre-school. In the process I had to explain who I was to the child. Of course what was in record was my daughter’s name, Rachel, with her cell number. Feeling as though I would hyperventilate, I told the nurse my daughter had passed to be with Jesus the previous August from COVID-19 complications. She remained professional but still expressed her condolences. I was wearing a heart-shaped locket my husband had given me with a sunflower on it. Sunflowers were Rachel’s favorite flower. I opened it up to show the nurse the pictures inside, one of Rachel as a little girl and one more recently. She quickly put her hand over her mouth as she audibly gasped and began to cry. Did she know my daughter personally? No, not really. Her words touched me. “I remember her. She was always so kind.” As I waited for her to give me the documents I had came for she exited the office and broke all protocol to embrace me. I don’t remember her name but I will never forget what she said and what she did. She broke protocol. I’m so glad she did.
“Breaking Protocol,” going against the official procedure or ways things should go, has taken on a hugely enlightened meaning to our family during these past six months. As we are beginning to allow God to reveal Himself in our pain, loss, doubt, and horror, we are starting to see He was there from the beginning. He didn’t just show up when I called out to Him feeling I could not take another breath. He actually set things into motion ahead of time. He broke protocol.
Rachel's Voice 